Ideals and flexibility in close relationships

Abstract

Two studies examined the roles that ideal standards aphics. for a romantic partner, and the flexibility of these standards, play in relationships. In the first study, 239 men and women involved in dating relationships were asked to rate themselves and their ideal partner on three dimensions (warmth/trustworthiness, vitality/attractiveness, status/resources), report how likely they were to be satisfied with a person who does not match their ideals, and to rate how closely their current dating partner matched their ideal standards. Self-perceptions were positively related to conceptions of an ideal partner, and positive self-perceptions were also related to being less flexible with respect to ideal standards. Further, perceiving a dating partner as more closely matching one's ideals was related to higher relationship quality, and this elect was moderated by ideal flexibility for the warmth/trustworthiness dimension. Study 2 tested the same hypotheses as Study 1, but did so with both members of 104 dating couples. Using special procedures to analyze dyadic data (i.e., the Actor-partner Interdependence Model; Kashy & Kenny, in press), the same pattern of results was found in Study 2. Study 2 also illustrated that higher relationship quality was reported by those who more closely matched their partner's ideals.