Coming out to the family : an exploration of the role of selected aspects of family functioning in the disclosure decision and outcome
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1985
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Abstract
The major purposes of this study were to explore the perceived parental characteristics that may relate to accepting or rejecting a gay son, to explore the differences between families of disclosers and nondisclosers, and to evaluate the relationship between coming out to parents and the gay son's self-esteem and acculturation into the gay community. Ninety-three self-identified gay males participated in the questionnaire study. Most gay sons reported relationships with their parents deteriorated after disclosure. Parental values and characteristics associated with homophobia were found to be good predictors of how the parent-son relationship changed. As more time passed since coming out, the respondents reported most relationships improved to the predisclosure level or better. The Family Environment Scale was used to explore familial differences between disclosers and nondisclosers. Those who are more open about their sexuality with their parents come from families that encourage expressiveness. Those who are less likely to want to be open come from families which place a high emphasis on cohesion. Remaining in the closet may be related to enmeshment. The gay male's level of self-esteem as a gay person is directly associated with his openness to his parents. The person who has disclosed has a higher view of his sexuality. In addition, the longer he has been open, the better he feels about his sexual orientation. Acculturation in the gay community is also related to level of openness. Individuals who are closeted to their parents and who do not desire to come out scored themselves lower on involvement in the gay community than the group that has come out and the group that is still closeted but wants to come out. Recommendations for future research include a longitudinal study of the gay individual going through the coming-out process, and exploration of how family variables influence the coming-out process of lesbians.
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Major counseling psychology